About 21 years ago, my wife Trixie and I were walking around SM North Edsa, bags ready, as anytime our first child would be born. Then, our baby's arrival was about 7 days late. A few days after, on October 10, 1988, in the midst of a heavy down pour and flash floods that relegated Shaw Boulevard into Manila's biggest parking lot, we welcomed him to the world.
Trixie went on labor for hours. As it was nearing supper, I decided to get food for the lolas who patiently waited for our baby's arrival. Shaw Boulevard was still clogged. So I decided to scoot into the small streets of Mandaluyong and San Juan to get to the Greenhills Shopping Center. Contented with some Tropical Hut Burger take out, I went back to the Lourdes Hospital. As I stepped out of the lift in the delivery room floor, I caught both lolas raising their hands in glee as they received the good news. The Lord gave us a boy!
We were hoping and were prepared to have a girl. The list of girl's name we had was long. As we did not have a boy’s name in our list and were pressed by the hospital to give them a name to put in his birth certificate, we named him, Joseph Patrick. Joseph from my name, Patrick from Patricia. We called him Jopie.
Before he was 1 year old, Jopie recognized words and would be able to point them in a book. He seemed extremely intelligent and we started to have very high hopes for him. We were very happy to be a family.
Our lives went on normally until one Holy Wednesday when at the age of 2, our firstborn suffered his first severe epileptic attack in Alabang Hills. Ironically, we were on our way to his pediatrician that day. He slumped all of a sudden in the car. We thought he was dead. We thought he choked on something as he turned blue, tongue sticking out from his mouth. He seemed to be having difficulty breathing. Then he burst into a loud cry and hugged his mom. We frantically sped, undecided on whether to bring him to the Paranaque Medical Center or to Makati Medical Center. We decided to rush him to Makati, where his pediatrician was.
In the hospital, he was diagnosed with seizure disorder. The doctors stuck needles to his tiny arms to control the convulsions. They had to mummify him to administer the shots. Seeing my child helpless and being punctured felt more painful than being stuck by the needles myself.
We spent the rest of Holy Week at the Makati Medical Center. He went into convulsions several times more. As he was helpless, we were helpless too. I could not do anything to stop the seizure attacks. As Trixie could not bear to look at our helpless child during an attack, I would look at his face, cry, run my fingers through his hair and whisper in his ear that it would be alright and all of these would pass.
And as if God was teasing me then, the program that showed on TV during one of the seizure attack was the "Sacrifice of Isaac by Abraham".
Since then, the mere sign of an impending fever prompted us to wrap him with wet towels to prevent his temperature from rising to 38 C. At this temperature, he would have seizures. We never left our house without our supply of paracetamol suppositories, anti-convulsants and a tea spoon (we used this as a tongue depressor).
Many years after, at the age of 7, he would be diagnosed with LKS or the Landau-Kleffner Syndrome. Our baby had been diagnosed with a rare disorder that affected his ability to understand and speak. There had been only 150 cases of LKS reported between 1957 to 1990 according to the National Institute of Deafness and Other Communication Disorders.
Sometimes you question the motives of God in allowing such to happen to a sweet child like Jopie.
We were lucky to have been introduced to Dra. Ledesma, his pedia neurologist and the OB Montessori School in Las Pinas. My driver Jun, who has been with us for 13 years now, distinctly remembers how he had to carry Jopie to the car. He dressed him up in there and prepared him to go to school.
Jopie, at that age, hated school. Perhaps, he did not understand why he was there. Perhaps, he was uncomfortable going to class and not being able to understand and speak his thoughts out. His teachers reported that he would often get frustrated and in his inability to express himself, how he feels, he would cry. He became very reclusive. The only people he mingled with were his family. He said many times before that he did not want to grow up anymore.
At one point in time, I was nearly in tears and told my parents that I would probably just buy Jopie a nice camera and build him a studio. He seemed to have a good knack for photography and I thought that would help support him when he grows up.
OBMontessori had facilities and a curriculum for children with disabilities. Dra. Lee, the principal, the guidance counselor, his teachers in school, my wife Trixie and I met twice a year to discuss his progress and to carve out a development plan for Jopie.
In OBMC, Jopie was given leniency in tests in his early years. His teachers patiently explained the test questions to him. He would also be allowed to extend beyond the normal test duration. The teachers were extremely helpful and generous in according him these privileges as they genuinely wanted our son to improve and live a normal life.
I distinctly remember when he was about to enter Grade 6, our meeting with Dra Ledesma and the school teachers arrived at the objective of improving Jopie's self confidence in the coming year. We wanted him to talk more and be more confident in being with people. The strategy was to enter him in the declamation contest of the school. I myself was skeptical that he can be persuaded or even be forced to do this. So when he was assigned by the teacher as a contestant, I was prepared to accept failure. But he surprised everyone. He accepted the task without hesitation. I assured him that I will always be there to help him go through this contest.
Jopie immediately memorized his lines. At this age, he showed diligence and hard work. He practiced for hours and he hardly complained. He stumbled in the beginning but he never gave up. I was not about to give up too as there was no one else he could rely on in these trying times except me, his family.
It was a tough job. I had to condition him that he was going to speak in front of a crowd. It scared him but he had a firm resolve to hurdle this task. He was determined and focused. I needed him to act, put gestures in the important lines of the literary piece. He needed to deliver the piece with feelings. And after about 3 weeks of practice, Jopie was done. Was he ready to stand in front of hundreds and finish his piece? I tried to prepare myself for the worst.
On the day of the declamation, I had to be in the Philips Lighting ASEAN General Manager's Meeting in Bangkok. Half of me wanted to be there with him, half of me was scared to death and would prefer not to see him go through the challenge and possibly fail. I prayed hard to God to give Jopie enough courage to finish. Just to finish... that is all I ask. He had been through a lot already and I did not want him to experience trauma in front of a crowd should he forget his lines or feel shy. I did not want him to fail. That would set back his progress.
I waited patiently for the results. I exchanged sms with my wife to monitor the proceedings. Jopie was the last declaimer. My wife reported immediately that he finished his piece and he did well. I was overwhelmed with joy. Tears started to fall as I attended the meeting in Bangkok. The next thing I knew, I got a message from my wife. And to my surprise, Jopie finished third place and got his first medal. You just cannot imagine the joy I felt while reading the message. This would be the start of a great turnaround.
Jopie won in the declamation contest again the following year. He was better, had more conviction and showed more feelings in his delivery. His voice now sounded more confident. He delivered his lines like a veteran orator.
He also started to show progress in academics during High School. Like my other son, Adrian, Math subjects or anything that had to do with computing was his competence. He also started having friends and socialized more. He played basketball in the Alabang Hills Summer League and even joined the OBMC-LP varsity basketball team on his third year.
In his last year in HS, he promised to make me proud. He said that he will make me go up the stage come graduation day. He won another bronze medal in declamation and I went up the stage as a proud father to award him his medal. In academics, he graduated in the top quartile of his class.
He passed the DLSUCET. He also found "an inspiration". Currently he is in fourth year in the College of Business Economics majoring in Accountancy at DLSU. He wants to be like his mom. He was a Dean's Lister as a Freshman in DLSU and is currently part of the remaining few in his block to survive the rigors of an Accounting course.
All of these would have never happened if not for his determination to improve and the undying support of Dra. Ledesma, Mrs. Magallanes (the principal), the guidance counselors, his teachers and all of those who cared for him.
God certainly works in mysterious ways. He challenges all of us to believe that nothing in this world is impossible just as long as we cared and worked hard to help ourselves and others.
God has given Trixie and I a great gift in Jopie. Obedient, caring, sweet, and intelligent, he would be the son that any parent would wish for.. He is so sweet that he never fails to show love and respect for all us. He has grown to be very responsible. Jopie is also dependable and goes out of his way to accommodate anyone who needs help.
He now drives the family car. He has taken over my weekend driving chores. He can now also be depended upon to take his lola for her medical check-ups. During his vacation, he brings to and fetches his baby brother Adrian from school and his practices. He has become more sociable and have built camaraderie even with his new set of friends in DLSU. In short, he has for sometime now lived the life of a normal teen.
As I now look back many years after that sad morning when he was 2 years old, I cannot help but praise the great work of God, the greatest turnaround I have ever seen.
This is how my friend, Mitch Bautista, calls this concept. I tend to agree.
